Family Hauler: Too Many Kids Edition

"shop-teacher" (shop-teacher) 09/04/2014 at 22:37 • Filed to: Vans

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My wife and I are planning to have two kids. So far, we've got one down, one to go. But the reality is, twins run in my family (my dad was one of 11 kids, the last four of which were two sets of twins), and my wife's grandmother was adopted, so family history unknown there. So, you never know. We were doing some shopping for a new vehicle for her (leaning towards a CX-5), but we've decided to wait, just in case twins are in the cards.

So, I've been doing some thinking. What would we buy, if that happens? No, not a minivan. She hates them even more than I do. I hate them, because I find the drivers seating position in every one I've driven, to be ungodly uncomfortable. I think we'd get her a Flex. We both like the Flex, but she doesn't want anything that big. But, if we have an extra kid, she can deal with it.

Me though, I think it would time for a real van. Pictured is a 2014 Chevy Express 2500 LT (gotta get the LT, otherwise you get the ugly sealed beam headlight grill, yuk!). It seats 8-12, has a 6.0 LS motor, a 6 speed trans, a 10,000 pound tow rating, and power going to the correct end of the vehicle. They even make it in orange! Which, for some unknown reason, they call "Wheatland Yellow". C'mon GM, I know DOT orange, when I see it. Maybe I'd even put an 01 on the doors, for shits and giggles. Yeah I think that'd be the one.

Big Bubba Ray > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 22:39

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This is what you need.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 22:39

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3 kids=Fuck it, buy a delivery van?

Dunnik > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 22:42

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Well, if you were planning on having, um, like 9 kids, then yes!

Otherwise, there's an answer to the "anything but a minivan", the CUV.

The Flex - sorry, FLEX - is nice-looking, like a long-roof of old. I hate recent Ford interiors, though.

Why not get a wagon? Subie? Volvo? BMW? Or a Roadmaster! It's pretty much as long as a friggen GM van anyway.

Matthew Phillips > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 22:42

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Get a Ford transit :D

Sportwägen, Driver Of The Red Sportwagen > Big Bubba Ray 09/04/2014 at 22:42

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YES a Dajiban!

AM3R > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 22:44

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If you just have two kids pick up a wagon.

6MT RWD 328i wagon anyone? (Won't be new though)

itranthelasttimeiparkedit > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 22:45

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the green is pretty sharp too. Everyone knows the real answer is sprinter van though.

Also I think you're just hoping for lots of kids so you can buy a passenger van

My citroen won't start > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 22:49

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AMG is almost never the correct answer, but this time it is.

Not too big, seats 7 and luggage, 6.3.

Big Bubba Ray > Sportwägen, Driver Of The Red Sportwagen 09/04/2014 at 22:50

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Yes! Someone else knows of this!

Sportwägen, Driver Of The Red Sportwagen > Big Bubba Ray 09/04/2014 at 22:51

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I remembered it, but I'm not sure how. It was probably from some Jalopnik article back at the beginning of the year lol

Sportwägen, Driver Of The Red Sportwagen > Big Bubba Ray 09/04/2014 at 22:52

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Back in October of 2013 LOL

shop-teacher > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 09/04/2014 at 22:56

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Yes, but only because I like them. The third kid would be my excuse.

shop-teacher > Big Bubba Ray 09/04/2014 at 22:57

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I can dig it!

lonestranger > Big Bubba Ray 09/04/2014 at 22:58

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As do I. GIS "GTA Dajiban", and the first two hits are GTA V Bravado Youga with "LONESTGR" licence plates.

jariten1781 > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:00

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Used conversion vans are where it's at. They depreciate like all get out. Craigslist always has a few decent ones for 5-8k that stickered for like 100 grand a couple years ago.

shop-teacher > My citroen won't start 09/04/2014 at 23:01

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I don't have the intestinal fortitude to maintain an aging German car. Or the bankroll for that matter.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:01

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At that point, "I like them" would be a better excuse. Nobody would believe you if you told them " I needed a 15 passenger van because I have 3 kids."

My citroen won't start > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:02

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How about a bit less of AMG and some Carmax?

http://www.carmax.com/enus/view-car/…

shop-teacher > AM3R 09/04/2014 at 23:03

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I tow a 4000 lb camper. If we only end up with two kids, I'll just keep my '06 Sierra crew cab.

shop-teacher > Dunnik 09/04/2014 at 23:04

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I love the wagons, but I tow a 4000 lb camper, and would like to get a bigger one.

Vicente Esteve > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 09/04/2014 at 23:05

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Thats actually a fantastic quote

lonestranger > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:05

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Depending on the light/camera, Wheatland Yellow is, IMO, closer to yellow than orange. It's basically School Bus Yellow .

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Vicente Esteve 09/04/2014 at 23:06

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Which one?

AM3R > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:07

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ah I see. If you end up axing the truck I'd go for a diesel SUV (X5, toureg, Q5, Grand Cherokee)

norskracer98-ExploringTheOutback > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:07

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Subaru Impreza, back seat should be able to fit 4-5 children. If I can lay down in the back seat, they'll fit.

shop-teacher > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 09/04/2014 at 23:11

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8 passenger van ... But yeah ...

Vicente Esteve > sm70- why not Duesenberg? 09/04/2014 at 23:11

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" I needed a 15 passenger van because I have 3 kids."

shop-teacher > AM3R 09/04/2014 at 23:13

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That could be fun. Although they don't have anymore seats than my truck.

shop-teacher > lonestranger 09/04/2014 at 23:15

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Ohhhh, that looks way different than on GM's site. Damn. Then I'll have to default to the dark blue.

shop-teacher > jariten1781 09/04/2014 at 23:16

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Those would be a definite possibility.

boxrocket > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:16

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Instead of the very-dated and heavy Express, why not the modern, efficient, and almost infinitely-configurable Transit? Comes in School Bus Yellow for irony, plus you can agonize over length and roof height options!

Alternately, if you like the Flex but feel it's too big, the Edge has many of the same benefits in a smaller package: One less row, slightly higher seating position, and still safe and decent economy; ny brother and sister-in-law have one and prefer it to the Explorer that predated it, and my two nephews are able to climb in and out on their own with no worries about heavy sliding doors like on a van, or too-high seats like my brother's Super Duty work truck. Or, to split the difference between the Edge and Flex/Explorer (about the same size as a Flex, but taller and off-road capable), consider the Mazda CX-9: It's on the same platform as the Edge, but offers three rows of seats in a slightly more compact size than the Explorer/Flex, and slightly larger than the Edge.

shop-teacher > Matthew Phillips 09/04/2014 at 23:17

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Maybe. Kinda ugly though.

AM3R > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:18

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X5 has 3rd row option, although it's really only for kids.

I'd step up to a Q7 if you need a 3rd row.

shop-teacher > itranthelasttimeiparkedit 09/04/2014 at 23:28

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I like the green too. Sprinters are too expensive and they rust like crazy.

shop-teacher > boxrocket 09/04/2014 at 23:31

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I prefer the Express to the Transit. Maybe I'm a bit of a luddite? :)

The Edge doesn't do anything for me, but the CX-9 is a possiblity.

shop-teacher > My citroen won't start 09/04/2014 at 23:41

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Still makes me nervous.

Kanaric > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:45

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clip your nuts before it's too late.

boxrocket > shop-teacher 09/04/2014 at 23:52

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Understandable, especially as the Transit is still new (not even on sale yet IIRC) and the front isn't as handsome as it could/should be. I prefer the Econolines/E-Series to the Express/Savanna, mostly because I've worked on both, and while both have cramped engine bays, Ford gives enough room for routine tasks, like putting in oil and changing filters. The "doghouse" on the gm twins makes me wish there were a way to easily drop the drivetrain from the body for regular services. It's that bad.

Skater Dad > shop-teacher 09/05/2014 at 01:40

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My wife & I had a similar decision to make last year. We knew someday we'd want 3 kids, and wanted to ensure we had 2 vehicles capable of carrying them.

We already had a 2011 Toyota RAV4, which can seat 3 children if you get narrow enough car seats. What sold us originally on it was the amount of storage space since Toyota left the rear end boxy.

Like you, we also hated the idea of a mini van. But eventually practicality relented and we started to consider it. After more reading, we started shopping around for a Honda Odyssey, eventually getting a 2011 EX-L. That van has the most comfortable captains chairs I've ever sat in, and the back can fit 4x8 plywood flat if you remove the seats.

That 2014 Chevy Express sounds pretty badass though. Can't go wrong with a V8. You won't be getting all of the nice family-oriented design features of a minivan, but you do get burnouts... Tough call.

orcim > shop-teacher 09/05/2014 at 04:09

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There are only two questions that would determine what I say, here.

1) How much time do you want to spend "packing" when you need to roll? One of the most liberating things I found with a larger vehicle (minivan or whatever) is that I spent zero (0) [ZEERO] time packing - I opened the back for whatever activity was planned, shoveled, closed it and left. If that's your idea of wonderfulness, larger is better, even if you can't see it now. (And if coastal based, maybe consider the space of water sports equipment? )

2) Are you gonna drive said vehicle into the ground? If yes, then social/soccer/friends/parties/etc. all become relevant in the not so distant future. If no, then none of that future stuff matters and you're just gonna adapt (and buy/lease) to the new requirements as they grow.

Me? I have a 21 year old 93' previa and have not regretted buying it for a second. (3 boys, bought just before first one born.)

shop-teacher > orcim 09/05/2014 at 07:25

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1. I spend way too much time packing before a trip, trying to fit everything needed under the tonneau cover of my truck.

2. Oh yeah, I'll drive it into the ground.

shop-teacher > Skater Dad 09/05/2014 at 07:26

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I'm thinking burnouts :)

Haase > shop-teacher 09/05/2014 at 10:50

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How about a RAM ProMaster luxury conversion van? Tows 5,100lbs, seats 7-9 passengers, 32" HDTV, 20+ MPG, and front wheel drive.

shop-teacher > Haase 09/05/2014 at 11:38

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I have to admit, painting that giant bumper body color, helps deugify the ProMaster quite a bit. Not digging the front wheel drive, and a 5100 pound tow rating would only barely be adequate for my current camper, and wouldn't allow me to expand to a bigger one.

orcim > shop-teacher 09/06/2014 at 01:07

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if ((packing_optimization $and$ drive_it_to_ground) == true) then {

reaction<= buy(large enclosed vehicle);

if (reaction == "No Way José") then {

increase_rolling_frustration(medium);

require_continuous_change(true);

} else {

decrease_rolling_frustration(high);

increase_family_flow(true);

}

}

/* YMMV. Mine? I can't think of anything I've done that was more important than

removing that pain.

*/

orcim > orcim 09/06/2014 at 01:08

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God but I hate the kinja editor - it *was* formatted correctly, if not coded correctly.

shop-teacher > orcim 09/06/2014 at 08:12

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Yeah, but I got the gist.